Short jokes
What is killing your friend called?
A homie-side.
What did the pencil say to the other pencil?
Your looking sharp!
Why do cows wear bells?
Because their horns don’t work.
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Why do basketball players hate gravity?
Because it's always bringing them down.
A girl asks her Asian boyfriend if he wants to eat her pussy. He asks her why she is taking off her clothes, instead of cooking her cat.
What is a retard's favorite race? The grand autismo.
I have no friends, but then I realize my true friends are anxiety and depression.
Me: I fucked your mom.
Orphan: I don't have a mom so you fucked the air.
Why do giraffes have such long necks?
Because their feet smell!
Nobody knows how bad you smell.
Stupid.
Hi boo!
Why would you never donate to crabs?
Because they're shellfish!
Why did the Texas cow own its own dachshund?
The cowboy told it to "get along little doggie."
What do you call your son?
An mistake.
Press F to pay respects to Grumpy Cat!
FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF
How many fat people are in my house?
20, counting the kids in the basement.
What's a furry's favorite news network?
Fox!
I quit my job at the bank today. I lost interest.