I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day, but I couldn't find any.
Short Jokes
"Déjà moo": The feeling that you've heard this bull before.
An invisible man marries an invisible woman. The kids were nothing to look at either.
Knock, knock. Who's there? Fuck. Fuck who? What, are you kidding me? I just wanted to tell you a joke!
If I were to not eat the last biscuit, I would feel "crumby."
He probably picks hair off his dad’s dick, then probably puts it in his hair.
Why do bees stay in the hive during winter?
... S'warm!
Are you wearing a diaper? Because your butt looks so saggy.
What happened to Stephen Hawking after he reached Heaven?
Nothing yet. He is still struggling to get up the stairway to Heaven.
What’s the difference between a zit and a priest? The zit waits 'til you're 12 to cum on your face.
What did the one-handed man have for breakfast this morning?
Finger food.
I caught my girlfriend cheating on me, with our dad.
Why did the zebra cross the road?
Why did the Oreo go to the dentist?
🎉🎇🎊🎆🎈
Have you heard of the... uh Pokemon called uh rhy... rhy... Rhydon deez nuts?
How did Helen Keller's parents punish her?
By rearranging the furniture.
Why don't they put petals on wheelchairs so when our arms get tired, we just use our legs?
I got a heart pain then I went to [the] hospital. When the doctor says I am dead, but I run then I jump. I am not dead!
GF: What did you use as kissing when you were little?
Me: My sister.
SWEET HOME ALABAMAA
What’s the definition of a pedophile, Tyler?