Short jokes
Have you heard of bees? They're bee-utiful!
What do you call a deaf child?
-Ryan Simmonite-
People can say whatever they want about pedophiles. At least they are pursuing their dreams.
In a white van.
Aaron.
"Knife to meet you all!"
Do you want to hear a joke about a construction?
Sorry, still working on it!
Why didn't the koala make the finals? It got diskoalafied.
What do Jesus and I have in common? Our dads left us...
This will take a ton of time.
A skele-ton.
I lost all faith in humanity. I am moving to Uranus; it's really big. I might get lost.
An assassin threatens a planet.
The planet remains calm.
The assassin: "Do you not realize the gravity of this situation?"
My sister and I were both adopted from the same country, and my parents say they got us on a "two for one special."
Who is better than Alabama?
CLEMSON TIGERS!
How do you get Dick from Richard?
You ask nicely.
What did the substrate say to the active site?
"C'mon baby, we fit together, open my door lock to f**kin' key."
I thought my wife was joking when she said she was gonna leave me because I wouldn’t stop singing “I'm a believer,” but then I saw her face.
It's punny.
My sexlife xddddddddd
A priest, a pedo, and a rapist walk into a bar and that's just the first guy.
Two priests are in a bar. One says to the other priest, "I'll swap you two fives for a ten."