Short jokes
What did the stop sign say to the street sign when he couldn't read a map?
"Can you give me some pointers?"
if an atom makes up everything im still suprised how it made ur mom
"Stupid ass baby."
Donald Trump is, like, really orange.
A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette were all lost in the desert. They found a lamp and rubbed it. A genie popped out and granted them each one wish. The redhead wished to be back home. Poof! She was back home. The brunette wished to be at home with her family. Poof! She was back home with her family. The blonde said, "Awwww, I wish my friends were here."
A guy was annoyed in a store. I walk up to him and said, "What's wrong, buddy? Don't worry, it's not like you're on an abandoned isle!"
What's Stephen Hawking's favorite snake?
Microchips.
What is a suicide pack's favorite song?...
Let the bodies hit the floor.
Me: I’m going to get burrito 🌯
Friend: You can have my burrito baby.
Gay.
Friend: *begins to moan*
Me: Finna hang up.
What do you call a person with no eyebrows?
Ms. Burgos.
Nuts, nuts, nuts!
Good morning? Goodbye!
What is so annoying? A younger sister.
What is an astronaut's favorite color? Zoo.
"What is your number?" "Hi."
What is yellow and can’t fly?
A school bus.
These jokes are offensive. Stop!
Nobody:
Me: "Nobody:" "Me:"
Stephen Hawking got an engine swap with a Nissan 350Z, and they said his wheelchair wasn't street legal :/
Stephen Hawking said God isn’t real, and the Priest put a boot on his tire. 😂😂😂