Short jokes
What does the man say about his baby sister Lydia? "I hope she electrocutes herself!"
My sister asked where is my book.... me: "itti badi nak hai gufa jaisi dhund us mei."
I ran into a dwarf and he said: "Well, I’m not Happy."
Then which one are you?
See you later, crocodile.
In a while, pedophile.
My girl is so cute when she sleeps. I watch her all the time... Tomorrow I might say hi to her for the first time.
The two biggest dyslexic guy lies: "My check is in your mouth," and "I won't come in your mailbox."
What did the mincrater do when his Xbox turns off?
He raged! 😱
I know five fat people, and you're three of them.
Which Pokemon listens to Aha?
Takemeon.
What did the math teacher write on his party invitations?
Be there or B2.
Why did Chad date the 9 yr old?
Because Stellas hot.
Why did the pillow cross the road?
Because his cousin's name was Koshin, and he didn't want to live anymore.
Did you hear about Fridgetair
Kelvinator?
Why does it take three women with PMS to screw in a lightbulb?
IT JUST DOES!!!!
What do you do when you hear your wife squirming around in the back yard?
Reload... chhchhhh.
What do you do during a shooting? Why, join in, of course...
Me: Cobain!
Friend: No, dude, it's Kobe.
Me: Why? Cobain didn't miss his last shot.
A Buddhist walks up to a hot dog stand and says, "Make me one with everything."
What do you call a lazy piece of meat?
A meatloaf.
What do you call an iPhone put into a smoothie maker?--An Apple smoothie.