Short jokes
I was ridin' your mom like she was Mario Kart!
Five minutes later, she agreed to get with me, so we went and rocked the minivan like, "Giggity, Giggity, Giggity!"
She had two gallons of milk, and I was starin' at her jugs.
I approached her in the checkout line and said, "Yo baby wassup?"
But her ass was lookin' good all up in those mom jeans!
Big Dolly Parton hair, like an 80s prom queen!
I first saw her in the Walmart picking out your drawers.
I was doin' your mom, yes yours!
You know we straight with doin' your mom.
Abdi and Tunde are real.
Public speaking is a more popular fear than snakes, and you don't see anyone walking in Australia and shout, "Look out! A podium!"
A girl named Ranch went to the store and stayed there. Why? Because she was ranched!
She said no, so I raped her.
What's the difference between me calling my girlfriend a pedophile and her calling me one?
Oh wait, I am because she's 10.
What happened when the 400+ women ate a slice of cake?
She died the next weekend.
What did the cow say to the prostitute?
Moo.
Why is the Reaper not funny at all?
Well, he tells dead jokes!
My owl turned 180 today.
He isn’t old, he just has a bad neck.
Give a man a match, he'll be warm for a while. But set a man on fire, he'll be warm for the rest of his life.
What did Nicki Minaj say when she sat next to a bomb?
"Bang bang right through the roof. Bang bang all over you."