Short jokes
Why did the boy study for his math test in a tree?
'Cause he wanted higher grades.
When the teacher dismissed the class to go home,
The orphan asked, "Where do I go?"
The teacher replied, "Home."
The orphan said, "Catch me on the streets then!"
Why can’t you trust an emo kid?
'Cause they always leave you hanging.
Priest
Why do I call my priest daddy?
Because he raped my mom when she was 13. She's 27 now.
How did Helen Keller get punished?
Her parents gave her a bomb and told her to eat it.
My sister's name is Coco, and one day she was funny, so I told her, "You coconut."
What do you call an orphan taking a picture?
A self-portrait.
Yo Nan.
Yo mama's so ugly, she went into a haunted house......
And came back out with a job application, then that ran away *CAUSE SHE'S A UGLY FUCK*
Your mama so fat, when she put a leg in the car, the wheels deflated.
My hair strainer is hotter than you.
My girlfriend is so fat, she looked into the mirror and said, "Woah, there are two of me!"
The other day, my wife asked me to pass her lipstick, but I accidentally passed her a glue stick. She still isn’t talking to me.
Why do I have the urge to stick a chicken wing up yo pussy?
What do you call a crazy-in-every-way sister?
A sissy.
I got stuck in the dryer again. Brother, say less.
Hey, look, it's Uranus coming from the sky!
A man can form Jupiter girls came from Venus, and other genders came right from Uranus.
The other day my brother hit me. I yelled for mom. No one responded.