Short jokes
What do you read on Halloween?
What's a witch's favorite subject?
Why doesn't Adele swim properly?
Because she's rolling in the deep. 🤽♂️
What's a boxer's favorite drink? A punch. 🥤🥤
What do you get when you add 5 + 2 + 3 + 2 + 200 + 10?
Completely confuse you!
A man walks in to the doctor.
He says, "Doctor, I need a new butt. Mine has a crack in it."
Doctor: How many times do I have to tell you!!!
If you are a banana, why don't you eat a banana?
Oh right, you'd be a cannibal. I mean a banan-i-ball.
You remind me of a snowflake, beautiful and unique. One touch and you're wet.
"Break me a piece of that Kit Kat bar."
My therapist told me that time heals all wounds. So I stabbed him, now we wait.
"Look, Ma! I peed in the pool!"
Someone cutting the cheese then farted.
Someone sees the cheese, and it smelled like crap (literally). He said, "Who cut the cheese?"
Technically, we have all been deeper in our mom than our dads have.
What’s the difference between a barcode and Rachel Sutherland’s wrist?
Nothing, they both get scanned for a fresh new pack of razor blades.
What does grass and Rachel Sutherland’s wrists have in common: nothing, they both get cut.
Why is the USA so bad at chess?
Because they already lost two towers.
What do kids play when they can't play with a phone?
Bored games.
Why does a woodpecker have a beak?
So as to not smash his head against the tree.
My sister said you smell, but then she saw her panties having moles on it.
I like zebras.