Short jokes

What is brown and sticky?

What is white and gooey?

What is long and hard?

(Tell me in the comments)

I remember asking my mum: "What's a couple?"

She replied, "Two or three."

Which probably explains her collapsed marriage.

Wanna know why not to joke about 9/11? They usually crash the party.

Here is the meaning of the name Gwen!

Good

Wise

Enough

Nice

Mean meaning of the name Gwen!

Grumpy

Words

Enough

Nasty

Red sky at night, shepherd's delight.

Blue sky at night, day.

There was a big problem yesterday.

My dishwasher has stopped working; her visa had expired.

SCHLOP SCHLOP SCHLOP SCHLOP SCHLOP SCHLOP SCHLOP SCHLOP SCHLOP SCHLOP SCHLOP SCHLOP SCHLOP SCHLOP SCHLOP SCHLOP SCHLOP SCHLOP SCHLOP SCHLOP

As a kid, I was made to walk the plank.

Because we couldn't afford a dog.

I've spent most of my life avoiding conflict. That's why I'm never intending to visit Syria.

I gave a blind kid a gun and told him it was a hairdryer.

What do Michael Jackson and Santa Claus have in common?

They both leave the little kids' room with empty sacks.

add me in Roblox wholetthedogsoutyou1 lol who let the dogs out you you you you you?

My mom was poor, so we had nothing to eat. I slept on the floor, but now I'm rich, rich, rich 😜

Kobe played I Spy and he said, "I spy a mountain."

My bad, I kick me bad in if balls, and he got so fucking mad.

She said she was hungry. So I fucked her in the ass and gave her a chili dog.

What’s the difference between school and prison? One is painted.

My ill sis said, "Why did the bear say no to ice cream?" and I said, "Why?" She said, "'Cuz it's stuffed!"

best friend makes 9/11 joke.

you: "hey, my dad was inside the tower."

best friend: "I'm sorry."

you: "I always knew he was a great pilot."

Racecar backwards is racecar, but racecar sideways is how Paul Walker died.