What do orphans and dinosaurs have in common?
Their parents are extinct.
Why did you go depressed?
Because you’re you.
The only time you see a depressed person lifted up is when they hang themselves.
What do you call a group of depressed kids?
The suicide squad.
3 year old boy: 1... 2...uh....?
Older brother: Ooh I know! 1, 2, 3 get the fuck off my apple tree!