Short jokes

Short jokes

I’d like to be a One Direction poster because I want to be nailed to the wall by a teenage girl ;)

Which planet would I consider dating?

I don’t know, but not Saturn because she’s already got a ring on her.

When your mom tells you to stop playing on the computer, you say, "Foot you!"

The pterodactyl went in my bathroom and peed.

When I was in the shower, I couldn't hear it. Why? Because the "p" is silent.