Short jokes
Stephen Hawking talks by clicks. Two clicks is "hi," and five is "dab me up."
Stephen Hawking shows up to a car meet-up.
How did Stephen Hawking die?
Of a bad internet connection.
What's the best thing about an orphan GF?
You don't have to meet her parents.
Aloneness is not the joke, it's unfortunately my reality.
Your momma is so dumb that when they said it was chilly outside, she came outside with a bowl.
Be careful around fire, plastic melts.
Me: Jaiden telling orphan jokes to my friend.
That orphan behind me...
Me: (Jaiden) Why are you crying? Do you know where your parents are?
Orphan: *Sobs* "No."
God, I love working at an orphanage!
Why did the orphan cry when the teacher yelled at him?
Because the teacher said, "Don't make me call your parents!"
One day I was passing a blind man and I gave him a gun and told him it was a blow dryer.
Next day I went for another walk and saw his grave.
When you are eating delicious street food in China and you ask the chef: You: "Is this chicken?" Chef: "No, its meow meow."
What do you call a binder with no rings?
What can you do if you have a rotten piece of candy?
What do you call a fish that doesn't play basketball?
Me: Let's go to Randy's.
Friend: There's no Randy's.
Me: Ran deez nuts with a car.
Me: Can I borrow your CD?
Friend: What CD?
Me: See deez nuts in your mouth.
My mom loved taking pics of me when I was a child. Thanks to that, people really believe my fake smiles! :3
Does an orphanage have daddy issues?
Yes, because he didn't come back from getting the milk.
Does Lightning McQueen get life insurance or car insurance?