Short jokes
What did the Mexican firefighter name his two sons?
Jose and Hose B.
Johnny, make a joke. The joke is you because Little Johnny has a sense of humor because you're an idiot.
Me and my twin when we share a pizza: there can be only one!
What's 2+2? FORE-head.
I went up to the depressed kid and said, "I like ya cuts G!"
Are you suicide? Cause I'm tryna commit to you.
I used to have an imaginary friend who I could talk to, and he could grant me wishes and stuff... and then I stopped going to church.
A phone is like parents. Not everyone has one.
Iceberg: You may know me.
Titanic: You are a sucker.
Iceberg: You hit me.
Titanic: Moron.
Iceberg: Waaaaaaaaaa!
Titanic: I don’t give a shit.
Why was my mate in "Mission: Impossible?" Because he couldn't find his dad.
If 6 is scared of 7 because 7 8 9, why is ten scared? Because it is in the middle of 9/11.
Somebody give me a peanut. I just ate an EpiPen.
What's America's no. 1 class?
Target practice.
"Guys, let's make this post have the most comments on the whole website."
WTF 850 COMMENTS???
Ok, there has to be SOMEONE on this website right now. Whoever that is, wanna chat? (I'm just bored)
My friend Andrew once told me that "weird is high and drunk at the same time."
What's autism! My name is Dee Snutz!
You're so skinny, if you take a bath you look like you're in an ocean. 🛀🏊♂️
You're so skinny, if someone farts in your direction, you will fly away.
Why do orphans love McDonald's?
Because the initials are like "mother" and "father."