Short jokes
What did Pavol Demitra think before the Yaroslavl plane hit the ground?
"Oh shit, did I leave the stove on at home?"
When the cow goes, "moo," and sheep say, "baaa," and the bull says, "boo!"
Brits don't exist. Mummies can't have kids.
Why you never have to give a balloon to Elsa?
Because she will let it goooooooooooooooo let it goooo!
Uremn es abarancin yngnumma gety asuma qshi tun?
What's the difference between a yellow line and a baby?
You can't run over a yellow line.
How do cows like to play games? Moobile (Mobile).
Cow jokes are udder-culous (ridiculous)!
Wow, these cow jokes are moo-amazing!
One day every kid at the orphanage got coal for Christmas. It was the second worst day of their lives.
When rejected:
That's ok, the 3 other little pigs said no, too.
What movie do orphans hate? The Fast and the Furious.
Do you know how many women have been pope?
Nun.
Why can't Helen Keller drive?
Because she is a girl.
Me: Hey, say I am ugly for a billion pounds.
Them: You're ugly.
Me: Sorry, I am not a mirror.
Man, I had a joke, but it left and never came back.
What is a gay school boy's favorite grade?
D+.
My brother called me short and ugly, so I called him an ambulance.
So I was being robbed, and this guy had the gun to my head, so I told him he was holding it backwards.
I would curse at you, but my country praises cows.