Short jokes
IAIAIICID
What’s the difference between a fruit and an orphan? One gets chosen :)
I broke my arm yesterday. My bro said it is Arm-ageddon, and I still don’t know why.
Jack and Jill went up the hill to get some water. Jill pulled up her dress and said, "Daddy, fuck me harder."
Me: Spell "I cup."
My Friend: I see you pee.
Me: BOII YOU BETTER GIVE MEH SOME PRIVACY IN MY BATH ROOM!!!!
My Friend: Oh hehe O-O
What do you call an avocado that got shot? Glockamole.
This joke is like a vacuum cleaner... it sucks.
What happens when a depressed kid try’s to high-five a tree?
The tree leaves them hanging.
What’s the difference between a job and a wife?
The job keeps sucking after 5 years.
What did the mom say when her child came out?
"The head was so big!"
Why do people eat cereal for breakfast?
Because why not.
Things I would have missed if my attempt in 2018 worked...
My attempts in 2019, 2020, and 2021!
Why did the female dicktator get fired? She had too much dick!
What's the difference between a dead hooker and a watermelon?
The watermelon didn't scream when I sliced it.
If I tell Stephen about these jokes, what is he gonna do? Chase after me? He better run fast!
What did the snail say to his ex-wife?
"I'm still leaving you!"
Why does Kermit like Miss Piggy covered in honey? Because he likes sweet and sour pork.
What do you call 4 Mexicans stuck in quick sand?
Quatro Sinco.
Therapist just mean the-rapist.
I got 99 problems but a chin ain't one.