Short jokes
The closest thing in a depressed person's life is a knife and his/her throat.
What was the worse purchase America ever made?
Spending billions on two rice cookers in 1945.
What's an orphan's favorite store?
Home Depot.
I was walking and I saw a girl crying, and she told me to take her dollhouse and I asked why. She said because I don't have one.
What do you call a white man sandwiched between two black men in a blue sleeping bag?
An Oreo.
I met an orphan with a dog yesterday. I chose the dog.
Did y'all ever hear about the great thunder crash of September 11th?
What's the food orphans can't eat?
Family-sized ice cream.
Uh, six teachers are annoying. Thank God I am not getting picked on at school or on this website.
Knock knock.
Me, a person: Who's there?
A: Deez nuts!
What do Paul Walker and I have in common? Neither of us have seen Fast and the Furious 7.
Why does an orphanage stay overnight at a school? Cause their parents won't pick them up.
What two things can you never have for breakfast?
Lunch and dinner!
Q: How did Helen Keller get a concussion?
A: She kept stepping on a rake.
Why did Orphan become famous?
Because he didn't need parent permission.
What do you call a woman in a fighter jet to the right of the president?
An escort.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Orange.
Orange who?
Orange you glad I didn't make a 9/11 joke?
What do you call Canadian weed? Canadabis.
You people who look at this sight, shame on you, fucking idiots!
Went to see a psychic the other day.
I knocked on the door, and she said, "Who is it?"
So I turned around and left.