Short jokes
What did the iceberg say to the Titanic?
"Go fuck yourself... at the bottom of the sea."
The only joke here is the topic.
What did Michael Jackson say to the little boy?
"Shhhhhhh, this might hurt a little."
Roses are white, violets are white, everything is white. I’m racist.
Why did a girl like bananas?
Because one day she might need to be ready.
What are the similarities between a pedophile and a 9/11 plane?
They both came from behind and crushed them.
What did the tissue wear?
A shoe.
Why do you only see girls in groups of 3, 5, 7, and 9?
Because they can’t even.
A child is determined to burn his home down. His dad watched, tears in his eyes. He put his arm across the mother and stated, “That’s arson.”
The emo kid ran away after his parents asked why they took the barcode sticker off the Oreos.
"Jiggle balls, jiggle balls, jiggle all the way."
"Dr. Squatch will heal the itch, and know it goes away, hey!"
Why is he sooo dam fineee?
Yo hairline is a distraction to my education.
What's a dying person's least favorite app? TikTok.
My impression of Michael Jackson's butler:
When answering the phone: "No, sorry, he's dead." *hangs up phone*
Why can't orphans be gay?
Because they have no one to call daddy.
What's the difference between an orphan and a baby?
The orphan gets back up.
Why do orphans only have Samsung's? Because they don't have a home button.
What’s the difference between Stephen Hawking and a refrigerator?
The fridge actually runs.
What did Michael Jackson say to the kid on his lap?
"You have a great singer inside you."