Short jokes
Why is Lucas so weird? I don't know, you tell me.
A: She looks good when she opens her hair. 😮
B: You will look good when you open your wallet. 👛
Who can drink 20 liters of fuel without dying? A jerrycan.
What did the mom tell her son when he asked for a bowl of cereal? "Sorry your dad wasn't came back with the milk yet."
you look like a dumb crab. When everyone sees you, the world will end.
Why are toads born with balls on their body?
Because they want more attention!
Why are dogs born with balls?
They were having their stick moment when they got given birth, too.
Yo mama's such a milf, she deserves a tongue punch in the fart box.
I went to a depressed person and said, "Do you wanna hang with me?"
Why did the chicken cross the road to get to the gay man's house?
Knock knock, it's the gay man. There's a chicken at my house.
What happens when a black person gets in a car? The check oil light turns on.
What do orphans and sperm donor kids have in common? They don't have dads.
How many foster parents does each orphan have?
One half.
What is the worst movie to watch at an orphanage? Batman.
Man: Okay, tell me a joke without the expense of anyone's feelings.
Me: Okay, so an Asian...
Why can't orphans play House Flipper?
'Cause they don't know what to do.
My friend: "Ess, stop with the self-harm jokes it's not funny."
Me: "C'mon it's not that deep."
What is the biggest fear of firefighters?
Burnout at work.
What happens when the terminator pees?
Gasoline descent.
What cigarettes does Churchill's wife like to smoke?
Blue Winston.