Short jokes
What is a photographer's favorite card game?
SNAP!
Why did the chief go to jail?
Because he beat the eggs and whipped the cream!
I hope Stephen Hawking was an organ donor, 'cause I need some parts for my go-cart.
What do you call a deaf person?
Whatever you want!
What type of candy does the most magic?
Twix!
Your forehead is so big you can headbutt my face and chest at the same time.
What is the difference between a puppy and a fork?
I don’t microwave forks.
What is the best la?
A koa-la!
What is the difference between a detective company and a man with eyes on his butt?
One has a private eye, and the other has eyed privates.
Why don’t witches wear underwear?
To get a better grip on their broom.
The 3 life rules:
1.
2.
3.
Oh, there are no rules, because you have no life.
Why are cows such great dancers?
They have all the best moooves!
Adin, you should consider eating pencil lead, you fat cat lover, only if you're the new Adin from FF though xoxo da babby.
What do strippers and peanut butter have in common? They both spread for bread.
What’s the best part about having sex with 28 year olds?
There are 20 of them.
What do you call a group of sped kids with AK-47s?
Special forces.
I was cussing out this kid for stealing, and their mom walked in and said, "Hey, language!" I just said, "English, bitch!"
I remember locking my door, but then I went downstairs to hear someone say, "I'm inside your home." I said, "GTFO my house, BICH!"
My best friend is an orphan, and we try to have sleepovers, but his parents never say yes.
Apparently, someone in London gets stabbed every 52 seconds.
Poor bastard.