She jokes
Joe mama so fat, she fell on both sides of the bed.
Yo mama so fat when she step on a scale it say, "To be continued..."
Yo mama so fat, when she stepped on the scale it said, "To be continued," and it said, "Fuck you."
Yo momma so fat that she don't need a backpack. She keeps her things in her Lagrangian points.
Your mama is so fat that when she fell, I didn't laugh, but the concrete cracked up.
Went to see a psychic the other day.
I knocked on the door, and she said, "Who is it?"
So I turned around and left.
Your mama so fat, she walked by a TV and missed eight episodes.
Q. What does a Russian girl do when she gets unexpectedly pregnant?
A. Has an abortion.
When Ariana Grande broke up with Pete, she said, "I have one less problem without you."
Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.
Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.
Wow, Gwen even said she loves TJ! She just did!
Prince, look at it. You are going to be crushed. It is in bored jokes and it has 65 comments, look there!
Did you know Hellen Keller had a doll house in her backyard? Neither did she.
How does Hellen Keller meet men?
She goes on blind dates.
Why did Sally fall off the swing?
Because she had no arms.
Knock, knock.
Not Sally.
A husband came back from a business trip and found out that his wife was pregnant. At first, he got a bit suspicious, but then he just ignored it and hugged his wife with happiness. The second when he met his friend and told him the news, the friend just said, "Wait, what? I thought she was on pills!"
My wife wanted a boob job. I told her it was too expensive.
I told her all she has to do is take some toilet paper and rub it in between her boobs for a few days, and they would get bigger. She asked, "How is that supposed to work?"
I replied, "I don't know how it works, but it did a heck of a job on your ass!"
This bunny named Mason came up to a bar and ordered a beer and a burger. He sits at a table and the waiter brought a huge burger.
Mason: "Heh. Good thing I eat like a horse." He looks up at the waiter.
Waiter: "You are a nasty little bunny, aren't you?"
Mason screamed and ran away as the waiter chased him... she was a HORSE.
So I was at a restaurant and I really hit it off with the waitress, so one thing led to another and I'm at her place and she was really nice at the IHOP but when I was there with her she was all like "ahhh! what are you doing!?!?!? how did you get in my house?!?!?" and then she punched me and I'm the one who ended up in prison.
I was walking down the street when I saw my ex-girlfriend, so I fucked her. Turns out it was her identical twins that she never told me about.
And I decided to confront her. So I did the next time I saw her, but this time it was her identical triplet. There are 3 of them...
AND SHE NEVER BROUGHT THAT UP IN THE 7 YEARS I WAS DATING HER!
A blonde walks into the doctor's office. She tells the doctor, "My boyfriend has dandruff."
The doctor tells her to use Head and Shoulders. She leaves. About an hour later, the doctor's phone rings. He answers, it's the blonde. The doctor asks how he can help her. "Well doctor, I understand head, but how do you 'hove' shoulders?"