She jokes

Handjobs

492 views ·

A man walks into a restaurant. The waitress hands him a menu and it says: "Hot dog: $2, Hamburger: $5, Blowjob: $10."

He asks the waitress, "Are you the one who gives the hand jobs?"

She says, "Yes, I am."

He tells her, "Good. Can you go wash your goddamn hands? Because I want a hot dog."

Fox

11 views ·

Foxy the fox was a careless fox. She didn't care about her friend Froggy.

Froggy was a careful frog. One day, Froggy decided to teach the fox a lesson.

Foxy was in her bed sleeping when Froggy made her room an entire mess. She got up, and then her mother berated her for not cleaning her room. From now on, she is a careful fox.

Floor

51 views ·

A team of cops and a news reporter are at a home where a violent crime has been committed. The head news reporter, in front of the camera, says, "A woman in this house has killed her husband because he stepped on the floor while she was mopping." He then turns around and asks a cop, "Has the woman been arrested yet?" The cop replies, "Not yet, we're waiting for the floor to dry."

Car

5 views ·

A man driving along a country road sees a little girl crying next to a cliff. He gets out and says, "Aw, what's the matter little girl?"

She points off the cliff, and at the bottom is the family car, burning with everyone inside, all mangled and dead.

The man unbuckles his pants and says, "Little girl, today just ain't your day."

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  • JFK

    82 views ·

    My favorite sex position is the “JFK,” I splatter all over her as she screams to get out of the car 😂

    Accident

    8 views ·

    Did you hear about Alicia's car accident?

    She was really drunk and all over the road until she was all over the road.

    Mama

    7 views ·

    Yo mama so FAT... I tried to picture her in my head... AND SHE BROKE MY GOD DAMN NECK!

    Emoji

    My friend texted me and asked me, "Hey. What's your favorite emoji?"

    I said, "😬😬😬😬😬😬😬"

    She said, "Why?"

    I said, "'Cause it's your twin."

    Sex

    18 views ·

    My crush said that she would rather die than have sex with me... It turns out that she was lying.

    Mama

    18 views ·

    Where did Sally go during the bombing? Everywhere.

    Your mama is so fat that when she was playing online, she crashed the whole server.