Sex jokes
Did you hear about the ninja pedophile? No one saw him coming.
What do you call a vegan slut?
A garden ho!
What does a penis and a Rubik's cube have in common?
The more you play with it, the harder it gets.
Why was baptism invented?
How else was a priest supposed to clean his sex toys?
I was blessed with a 9 inch penis.
The priest is in jail now.
Memes
I banged a German chick one time. I tried anal and asked her to rate the experience. She kept yelling "9! 9! 9!"
How did the hillbilly mother find out her daughter entered puberty? Her son's dick tasted funny.
Did Jesus die a virgin?
Nah, he got nailed...
What's the difference between a Lambo and a boner?
Your sister didn't give me a Lambo.
What can you tell a dog, but not your girlfriend? Come.
I brought my cousin to an arcade and I gave her $5 to go play a game, but she tugged my joystick too hard.
Pickup line; Hey mama, you school? Cuz I'd like to shoot some kids up in you.
My conversion therapy done worked. Now I only sleep with my sister and not my brother.
WARNING OFFENSIVE: What is the difference between a redhead and a brick? ... A brick gets laid.
Did you know that statistically, 1 in 10 people live next to a pedophile? Not me though, I live next to a 10 year old boy with a fat ass.
How do you get 4 gay guys on a bar stool? You turn it upside down.
How do you get them back off again? You jerk them off.
I met this girl at a bar and started doing her from behind. Everything was great until she turned and said, "My turn!"
Roses are red, grass is greener. When I think of you, I play with my wiener.
In death, what is the only organ in a woman's body to remain warm?
My dick.
A kid gets home from school and finds his mom and dad having sex. The kid asks, "What are you doing, Dad?" The dad replies, "Having sex with your mom, son," and he starts laughing.
The next day, Dad gets home from work and finds his son having sex with his nan. The dad shouts, "What the hell are you doing, son?" The kid replies, "It's not funny when it's your mom, is it?"