Sex jokes

Did you know that big black dicks can be weapons and can kill people?

Floyd Mayweather proved it when he gave it to Logan Paul in the ass.

The best night of my life was when I gave my virginity to my wife, and her last word was when she called me "Mommy" at the top of her lungs before I knocked her up 😍.

I have a penis, and sometimes I bite it.

I was listening to WAP in my car with my four-year-old cousin, and she asked why they don't fix the holes in the house.

Then my fucking boyfriend, what a hoe, was.

A prostitute walks in the bar, and she goes up to the bartender and says, "I just made $100 and 5¢ sucking dick." The bartender says, "Who gave you the 5¢?" The prostitute says, "They all did!"

Why do orphans love having sex?

Because they can finally call somebody "daddy."

My dick is red.

Your pussy's pink.

It's really tight

When you're dead.

2nd comments from Gwen in her bra.

Keie: Man Man man! I LOVE U!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

heyo: 👅🍑

Bari: STOP U FUCKIN PEDOS!!!!!!!!!!

Kenya Bailey: THAT IS ENOUGH! I AM REPORTING ALL OF THIS CRAP TO THE ADMIN!!!!!!!!!!!

Remera Karwi: Shut up! We jus tellin her she looks like a star no need for all that "crap".

Kenya Bailey: One guy put tongue and peach aka butt I know a little bit about oral sex my friend or not!

It’s like I always tell my kids:

"Two in the pink, one in the stink."

My dick's so big, I stuck it in your mom's loose hole.

My and my penis never truly understood the words "Booby traps" until we met the ex-wife. God's gift of self-will was working fine until my penis went hard and my mind went blank, and God started laughing, and I swear I heard him say, "Booby trap" as he walked away! True story.

It’s nice hitting it from the back when my wife has wide hips.

Her butt cheeks look like big huge ball sacks as my thighs smack up against them when I’m thrusting. I like to finish off by grinding my weiner up and down her back like a gay man frotting his schlong on his partner’s ding dong.

My dick is hard, what's your name?

The best part of you ran down your mother's leg... Einstein got ready to climax while doing math but realized you can't cumtilyain cumtilion. It's after sucktillion fucktillion.

What do boobs and toys have in common?

Kids end up playing with toys, but adults end up playing with boobs.

My d*ck is hard, what's your name?

He: "Do you smoke after sex?"

She: "I don't know. I've never looked."

Just 'cause I have a big penis doesn't mean I can't have sex.

My penis is too big for my dad to suck it, so my mum sucks it instead.

Have you ever tried sex when camping?

It's f***ing intense.