Self Harm jokes
You know what flowers and depressed people have in common?
Both end up getting cut.
I wish the grass outside of my house was emo, because it would cut itself.
Instead of Edward Scissorhands, I’m Edwardscissor wrists.
What is red and looks like a zebra?
My arm. Hehhehehehe UwU
A robber held up a depressed kid at gun point.
The depressed kid took the gun, and said, "I'll do it myself."
What do you call a group of depressed kids?
The suicide squad.
What's the difference between my thighs and my eyebrows? Nothing, I slit both of them.
I saw this girl with blue hair and slapped her wrist and said, “NICE CUT G!”
1. just feeling sad. 2. depression. 3. self harm. 4. suicide.
What do my clothes and a depressed person not have in common?
My clothes don't hang themselves...
Slit your wrists.
I got so bad about cutting myself every time I went to the bathroom, I wanted to break my jacket zipper off and use that!
What's great about an emo pizza?
It cuts itself. Yay!
Are you a knife? Because damn, I want you inside of me ;)
Tomorrow is Christmas, and I'm giving myself a present that I can't wait to open. It's my wrist. (Yes, this was inspired by a Fall Out Boy song.)
What’s the difference between my lawn and my wrists?
Nothing, I cut both of them.
Got into a fight last night. We both had blades. He cut me deep. I thought I was gone, but he forgot to keep the water running.
Weird thing was that we were in the fight of our lives in the restroom and that guy kinda looked like me.
While writing my suicide note, I got a paper cut... it’s a start.
What do cutting boards and a suicidal teen's wrist have in common?
They both have cutting marks.
I wish my hair was depressed.
Cause then it would cut itself.