Self Harm jokes
My friend: You really need to stop the SH jokes.
Me: But they're not that long.
How you feel when you slit yourself once: :(
How you feel when you slit yourself more than once: <:(
How you feel when you slit yourself everyday: *dead inside*
What part do people slit the most?
Everyone.
What falls quicker off a tree? The leaf or the emo?
The leaf, because the emo is stopped by the rope.
Why do emo kids wear hoodies all the time?
Because they are hiding stitches.
Why do emos cut their arms? Because they can't cut the rope.
Why do emos get discounts at every shop? Because they have barcodes on their wrists.
Someone asked me, "What are them scars on your arm?" I thought I was playing a violin.
Why is it okay to stab meat, but I can't stab myself? These woke lefties, BLM, Antifa, feminists, eco-warriors, pro-vaccine libtards are stopping your freedom and right to stab yourself!
If you want to SH but not in the sell farm way, come ooon.. do you even know what does that means?..
Therapist: What do you want to do when you grow up?
Me: Oh, I wan-
Therapist: Don’t say to be dead.
Me: Well, I want to be an entrepreneur. I want to sell land, pencils, oh yeah. I also want to sell farm.
brb makin' tic tac toe boards on myself.
I don't struggle with self-harm, I do it everyday.
Why do people like dating us emo girls? Because of the texture on our thighs.
What's the difference between a grape, an apple, and an arm? You don't slice a grape.
You know what really gets me under my skin when I'm down? Sharpener blades.
Any girl can be a squirter if you hit the right artery.
My friend: "Ess, stop with the self-harm jokes it's not funny."
Me: "C'mon it's not that deep."
Mom: You will make me kill myself.
Me who has cut first: I'll kill myself ✨first✨!
What's worse than a failed attempt at suicide?
The pity looks people give you and people keep you away from 'dangerous' things.