Sea jokes
"Octo" means 8 and an octopus has 8 legs... so where did the "pus" come from?
If your eyes were the sea, I would drown in them.
What did the pirate say on his 80th birthday?
Aye, matey!
There was an oil spill in the ocean. Now the ocean can't see!
What do you call male mermaids?
Mer-butlers!
Spongebob's teeth upside down is the twin towers.
Spongebob: 9 letters
Squarepants: 11 letters
Spongebob did 9/11.
"Hey, hey, Spongebob! Water you doing?" [laughs]
"Just looking for all my coins with my metal detector because beach better have my money!" [laughs]
"How much have you found so far?"
"Y'know what, I'm not really shore!" [laughs]
What do you call an orphan fish?
Self-ish.
What did the shark say when he ate the clownfish?
"This tastes a little funny."
Where do boats go when they get sick? The dock.
What do you call a fish without an eye?
Fsh!
What did one male whale say to the other male whale?
"She's gonna blow!"
Why did the octopus 🐙 beat the shark in a fight?
Because he was well armed!
What comes up on small oceans? Microwaves.
What is the weirdest thing to wear and what is the weirdest thing to say?
Weirdest thing to ware: Socks with sandals, also with flip flops!
Weirdest thing to say: "Would you rather be a bath or a toilet?" "The blue angel sea slug looks like an alien." (weird).
Bonus: Things to ware with other things: Crop top with t-shirt (really hip), Crop top with tights or shorts, dresses with tights! (Cool) Oh well byeeeeeee!
What sits at the bottom of the sea and twitches?
A nervous wreck.
What did Cinderella wear to the beach?
Glass flippers.
I've always wanted to WAVE to a dolphin, but it could never SEA me.
That dolphin is so WASHED up. WATER you say we get revenge?
What do Madeline McCann and a submarine have in common?
Both are at the bottom of the ocean full of seamen!
The pirate looked down the toilet, and what did he see?
The captain's log.