Say jokes

What did the ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing, it just waved.

I hate my life.

What did the pond brother say to his lake sister?

"Oasis!" (Oh, hey sis!)

Q: What did the man say after removing another man's hat? A: He was decapitated.

What did the cow say when it wanted to go to the movies? -- "Let's go to the moovies!"

American says: "US mein shaadi E-mail se hoti hai..."

Sardar ji says: "Accha, India me to shaadi.....Fe-mail se hoti hai...!!!"

What do Orphans say on Father's Day?

Well, not "Happy Father's Day."

Heard the phrase "one man's trash is another man's treasure"? Wonderful saying, horrible way to find out you're adopted.

Sonic says... April 1st is the best day to do a school shooting. They will think it’s a joke! 😃

A depressed man has been thinking of killing himself, and his friend says, "Find Jesus instead, he'll help you!"

And then the man says, "It's pretty hard to 'get help' from something that doesn't exist."

To all those who say this is a joke, it isn't. It's a core of humor and magic. It's a part of humor we can keep. Like if you agree.

You know the saying "One man's trash is another man's treasure?"

Wonderful saying! Horrible way to find out you're adopted! :DD

What did the toilet paper say to the other toilet paper?

"Hey, check me out! I'm on a roll!" 😂😂🤭🤭

Say "lettuce" and spell "cup."

What would a man say to flirt with a woman that has a big butt?

You are so butty-ful!

If someone has a gun and tries to shoot you, just say, “Hipity hoppity, that gun is my property.”

Man says, "What's Ligma?"

Woman says, "Ligma balls!"

Baby says nothing, she transgender.

What did the cell phone say to his wife?

"I will give you a ring."

What did one plate say to the other plate?

"Dinner's on me."

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Your grandma died, your dad left you too, Now you're living with your old grandma coot. Oh, let's not forget your mom left you, too. You gon' live alone, die alone, with no roses on your casket, too.

So a lady was walking down the street with two bags, and one of the bags was leaking $100 bills. A cop pulls up and he says, “Ma’am, ma’am, your bag is leaking hundred dollar bills.” Then she says, “Oh, thank you. I wonder how long that’s been going on.” And the cop says, “Before I help you, may I ask why your bag is leaking $100 bills?” And the lady says, “OK, I’ll tell you. So I live next to a stadium, and I have this beautiful rose garden, but these dumb teenagers always try and pee on the rosebushes. So they stick their junk through the fence, and I grab their junk. I said, ‘$100 dollars or it’s coming off.’” The cop says, “Oh, OK, well what’s the other bag for?” And she says, “Well, not all of them want to give me $100.”