Say jokes
What did the priest say to the Muslim? Wazza!
A disabled man stands up.
A blind man says, "You can stand?"
A deaf man says, "You can see?"
A mute person says, "You can hear?"
The disabled man says, "You can talk!"
Doctor: "What the actual f**k"
What did the spaghetti say to the sauce? Pasta la vista!
What did one mountain climber say to the other mountain climber?
Man, you are really on edge.
My ill sis said, "Why did the bear say no to ice cream?" and I said, "Why?" She said, "'Cuz it's stuffed!"
Why did the big rose say to the little rose?
"Hi, bud."
A man and a child walk into the woods. The child turns to the man and says, "Mister, can we go home? It's getting late, and I'm scared to walk home."
The man turns to the child and says, "How do you think I feel? I have to walk home alone!"
Mom: Son, get up for school.
Son: I AM UP *holds up books and says I'm up* IM UP MOM!
What did the hairdresser say to the power line?
"Want a power cut?"
What did the store manager say when they ran out of toilet paper?
We’re wiped out!
What did the nose say to the finger?
"Stop picking me!"
Confucius say, "Man who sit in church and fart must sit in pew."
What did the Canadian say when a guy shot his beaver?
"It is ok, I forgive you."
What do you say when a Spanish person loses a car?
Carlos.
What did Santa say when he saw a pretty girl?
HO, HO, HO!
What did one plane say to the other?
"It’s been a long day, I’m ready to crash."
Other plane: "No you’re not, we haven’t even gotten high yet!"
So a man asked another man, "What's your name?"
He says, "What's it to ya?"
So the guy asked again, "And he says what's it to ya?"
Come to find out his name was What's It To Ya.
A blind man walked into me at a store. I said, "Watch it, bitch!" and he said, "Sorry, I didn't see you there."
What did the bull say when he went to college?
Bison!
What did the cell say when it was dividing?
"It's not you, it's me."