Say jokes

What did the Turkey say to the other Turkey?

"They forgot the stuffing!"

What did the fat guy say to the tree?

"Get me some coconuts!"

I saw an orphan on the road. I asked him if he's an orphan. The kid says, "Yeah, what gave it away?"

I say, "Your parents."

A cop pulls me over and asks if I have been drinking.

I'm an honest person and say yes, I did, so I take off my sunglasses and tell him that I now had 2 glasses less.

What did the shirt say to the pants?

Belt.

Şehmus ne demiş? Ne bileyim, olm, ona sor.

You and your sister always get into a fight and she says, "I don't care." Then you say right away, "About you!"

Two scientists walk into a bar. The first one says: "I'll have some H2O."

The second one says: "I'll have some H2O, too." And then he died.

What did the Mexican say when a house landed on him?

Esé said, “Get off me, homes!”

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor?

"Where's my tractor!"

What did the stepdad say to the flower? You're grounded!

What did the doctor say to the mother after delivering the baby? Sorry.

What did the math book say to the guidance counselor?

You could say ancient Egyptians and JDM car fans are alike--they both worship Datsun.

Roses are red, I like weed,

If you say yes then I'll do a "good deed."

I have trash so I throw it at my sister and say that she is a trash can.

How do you surprise a blind guy?

Say, "Surprise!"

Women be like chivalry is dead, then don't say thank you when you open the door for them.

Fineman, Einstein, and Schrodinger walked into a bar.

Fineman says, "It appears we're inside a joke."

Einstein says, "But only to an observer who saw us walk in simultaneously."

To which Schrodinger says, "If someone's looking through the window, I'm leaving!"

What did one nut say to the other nut when it was chasing it?

“I’m gonna cashew!”