Say jokes

Q: What did the ocean say to the boy?

A: Nothing! Oceans don't talk, silly!

Fineman, Einstein, and Schrodinger walked into a bar.

Fineman says, "It appears we're inside a joke."

Einstein says, "But only to an observer who saw us walk in simultaneously."

To which Schrodinger says, "If someone's looking through the window, I'm leaving!"

What does one emo kid say to the other?

"I like your cuts, G."

What did the toaster say to the slice of bread? "I want you inside me."

Sonic says if you're ever born, punch an orphan. What are they going to do? Tell their parents?

This is not a joke, nor did I come up with it.

If somebody calls you ugly, just hug them and say, "Life must be hard for you since you have visual impairment!"

What did one plane say to the other? "Let's fly!"

When the emo kid says let’s play truth or dare, You know it’s about to hang over.

A guy walks into a restaurant and orders turtle soup. The waiter hollers, "One turtle soup!"

A moment later, the guy calls the waiter over and says, "I’ve changed my mind, I would like pea soup." The waiter hollers, "Hold the turtle, and make it pea!"

I saw an emo kid that got a haircut today. But instead of saying “Like ya cut, g” and slapping the neck, I slapped the wrist and said “Like ya cut’s g”.

I don’t see why people say that emo kids don’t like to hangout. I seen them hanging all day.

It is a known fact that you cannot say “harassment” without “her ass.”

I guess you could say, “harassment something.”

A man is depressed and he sighs. A bully says, "Stop sighing, you sound like some guys having a threesome!"

What did the dad say when he left the lollipop store?

"Cya suckers!🍭"

A farmer walks into his bedroom with his wife in bed with a sheep under his arm and says, "This is the pig I'm fucking." She says, "You idiot, that's a sheep!" He says, "Shut up, I wasn't talking to you."

What did the pirate say when he saw a ghost? He said, "Oh my God, it's me dead parrot!"

Saying a Kobe joke after he died tends to ignite a fire in the people you say it to.

What did the traffic light say to the other?

🚦🚥🚦 Stop looking, I'm changing!

What does the door say to the doorbell?

The door said: "You dingus!"

My teacher says no phones allowed. I say my phone is allowed because I’m nobody, Dania.