My girlfriend’s dog died, so I tried to cheer her up by getting her an identical one. It just made her more upset. She screamed at me, “What am I supposed to do with two dead dogs?”
A receptionist at the twin towers order two pepperoni pizza's, she was upset when she got two planes.
I brought my girlfriend home and introduced her to my family. My kids liked her, but my wife seemed upset
My therapist told me to write angry letters to those that upset me and never send them. He is really going to hate the letter he never gets.
Guys, We need to stop making jokes about orphans. Their parents might get upset. Oh, wait... never mind.
Why were the twin towers upset? They ordered domino’s but got jets
My last relationship ended because my ex girlfriend accused me of being a rapist. I'm not upset, to be honest I didn't like her anyway, she kept telling me I never listen, or something like that
“My Mum told me the best time to ask my Dad for anything was during sex. Not the best advice I’d ever been given. I burst in through the bedroom door saying, ‘Can I have a new bike?’ He was very upset. His secretary was surprisingly nice about it. I got the bike.”
What's were the twin towers upset? Because they ordered pepperoni yet plane arrived!!!
My parents telling me: "What doesnt kill you makes you stronger." Me upset about my suicideattempt doesnt succeed.
Everybody is mad cause that guy from Alberta punched a girl in a wheelchair. I think he was upset because he found out his sister was cheating on him.
Why was the peanut butter upset at his retirement party? He was roasted.
I take all my anger out on orphan why Because they have no parents to run to
Roses are red, pussies are wet, when it goes in he gets upset, she said it’s to small, so that’s all, but later that day, he wanted to say, every time I play, no one complains, so she was just lieing, she started flying, went out of her seat, the skirt went up, the greatest of them all, everyone said, fly away big chunky balls.
What is 1 + 1? They didn’t tell me. Their stomach is upset.
There was this man and he forgot about his wife's birthday. She was very upset and said that her present should come as fast as 1-200 by tomorrow. When she woke up she saw a present in the bathroom. It was a scale
Lemme just say one thing:
Depression is not funny. 2 of my best friends have it and its actually quite hard to watch them suffer with it. They cry all the time, they get upset all the time, they either have wanted to or still do want to kill themselves. Its really not funny to joke about depression.
A woman decides to take a well-earned vacation and she asks her brother to watch her cat while she's away.
On the second day, when she calls her brother to see how things are going he tells her bluntly that the cat is dead.
The woman is really upset and goes into hysterics, before saying, "You can't tell a person bad news so bluntly. You should break the news gently. The first day, you should have said that Fluffy was stuck on the roof and couldn't get down. The second day, you could have said that she had fallen, but the vet said she would be okay. Then on the third day you could have said that she died from complications."
The next day, the woman calls her brother again and asks how things are. He says, "Well, Grandma is stuck on the roof and can't get down ..."
what do you say to an upset down syndrome person... “what’s bringing you down?”
Why was tickle me Elmo upset when he left the factory? Because they only gave him one test tickle
