A dead Russian is trumps accountant
I like this Russian girl but she hasn't asked me to hang off a cliff while drinking vodka
A three strangers have opened a gay chat; but if one left the chat, the chat will be closed.
Stranger 3: how to turn a straight guy into a gay guy?
Stranger 1: you can't!
Stranger 2: you can
Stranger 3: how?
Stranger 2: by using the same idea of russian experiment; like in a detention, put him in a closed room full of gay stuff but the difference that he can sleep and he will have a food for 30 days and toilet too.
Stranger 3: great idea, but who can we try first?
Stranger 1: you all gays are evil monsters
Stranger 2: i think the stranger 1 is just a straight spy let's try this experi-
(the chat has been closed by stranger 1)
When you're Russian to the bathroom, and when you're finished you're from Finland. what are you when you are IN the bathroom?
European
Have you heard about the new russian std? Rottsmikokov
One night when I was six, I had this super annoying accent, and when I said the number "six," Oh no... One night my catholic priest asked me how many cookies I needed for my family. I told him six, but thanks to my accent being mixed with many others including Scottish, French, and Russian, it sounded like I said "I need to have sex." He looked at me strange then pulled me into a closest. Being a Pedo. When Momma asked me why I was missing for 6 hours I told her, "I went to get the cookies like you told me to, and father raped the Christianity out of me." The angry look she gave my father was amazing. Then with my Papa she beat the hell outta him.
Serves him right.
Russian twists into a ditch dead!
Russians be like bfddrhnnkhsaxbjk speak English!
*In thick Russian accent Let's buy some vodka, pollute the earth with oil, and make insecure nuclear power plants that break all the time! Ah, yes. The mother land. A great place to be. Not like those stupid urkrainian people who are living happy lives, they are crazy and need to die.
What does a "Smart Russian", and a "Unicorn" have in common?
Answer; Non-Existance!
What do children with cancer and Russian soldiers have incommon their life dosn't last long
Once at school, a teacher thought I was Russian why do think that I said the teacher replied because you're reading from Right to Left
Q : Name a muderer ? A : Jews : Hitler. Russians : Stalin Chinese : Mao Americans : Bin Laden Aborted fetus : My mom
Russians think they are tuffer than Americans. Here are some reasons for the Russians out here reading this
1 USA was NEVER invaded 2 USA never commits as many war crimes as Russia does! 3 USA made the first nuclear weapon so yeah shove that up your ass Russians 4 Our soldiers don’t rape kids 5 we have more Allie’s than you 6 we are smaller but stronger 7 Random civilians in the USA have stronger guns than Russian military does!
why did the russian cross the road?
to get to the other side
What does a Russian do for entertainment?
A nuclear world fair
