Rose jokes
So a lady was walking down the street with two bags, and one of the bags was leaking $100 bills. A cop pulls up and he says, “Ma’am, ma’am, your bag is leaking hundred dollar bills.” Then she says, “Oh, thank you. I wonder how long that’s been going on.” And the cop says, “Before I help you, may I ask why your bag is leaking $100 bills?” And the lady says, “OK, I’ll tell you. So I live next to a stadium, and I have this beautiful rose garden, but these dumb teenagers always try and pee on the rosebushes. So they stick their junk through the fence, and I grab their junk. I said, ‘$100 dollars or it’s coming off.’” The cop says, “Oh, OK, well what’s the other bag for?” And she says, “Well, not all of them want to give me $100.”
One morning a dad was sitting and watching TV.
His daughter comes in and says, "Dad! Why is my name Rose?" He replied, "Oh! It's because when you were born, a rose petal fell on your head." "Cool," Rose said.
The second daughter walked in and said, "Dad! Why is my name Daisy?" He replied, "Oh! It's because when you were a baby, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Awesome," Daisy said.
The third daughter came in and said, "DuUuUDeEeEeDrrrrrrrrr!!!" "SHUT UP, CINDER BLOCK!!!"
Roses are red, violets are blue, you know what else is violent? Suicide with me and you.
Roses are red, violets are blue, gum makes me beautiful, but what happened to you?
The man told the women, “Roses are red, violets are blue, you suck cock and you enjoy it too.”
Then she said that's true.
If they’re short and called Rose and born in June, they’re emo.
What's Jack's favorite flower? A rose.
Roses are red, violets are blue, Your ass is clean because Randy won’t stop liking [it].
Roses are red, I hate snitches, You talk a lot of game for a guy with 3 inches.
Roses are red, The forest is bushy, OMG did you just cum in my pussy?
Roses are red, you have a nice lip, it would look better if it was on my tit.
Me and rose bushes have something in common: mangled, can hurt, red, and people only like one part.
Roses are red, Violets are blue, Oh, you wanna die? I wanna die too!
Roses are red,
foxes are red,
I like your butt, let me touch it forever.
Roses are red, violets are blue, in the middle of the day, give me money, you!
Roses are red, my pencil is blunt.
A parrot trapped on a roof keeps telling the fire crew to f*ck off!
Roses are red, Violets are blue, Little Johnny is smokin' hard, The sun looks like Mountain Dew.
Roses are red, violets are blue, my mom and dad died, next you'll be gone too.
Roses are red, violets are blue, I fucked a chimpanzee behind my local zoo.
roses are red, unlike the rest, I'm the one who has your IP address.