Road jokes
What do you call a toddler lying in the middle of the road? Speed bump.
Why did the zebra cross the road?
Because he wanted to go to the Shell station.
I saw a sign that said, "Falling Rocks." I tried it, and it doesn't.
Chuck Norris knows why the chicken crossed the road.
Okay, so one time a deaf kid got into a car accident, but he didn't herd in on the news.
Why did your mom cross the road?
Why? She didn't, she got hit by a car.
My friend said this to me: "Were you born on a highway? Because that's where most accidents happen." :(
Why’d the chicken cross the road?
To get choked and stroked by Mr. Big Bloke!
“We’ll choke and stroke, it ain’t no joke!”
Why did the child cross the road?
Because he didn’t wear a seatbelt.
Were you bought on a highway? Because that's where most accidents happen.
How is a woman like a road?
They both have manholes.
Why did the gum cross the road?
It was stuck to the chicken’s foot.
Why can’t the baby cross the road?
Walls.
Yesterday I saw a guy spill all his Scrabble letters on the road.
So I asked him, “What’s the word on the street?”
You were born on a road. That's where most accidents happen.
I love playing zebra crossing, but I always get run over.
Why did Little Johnny drop his ice cream?
Because he got hit by a bus.
Why did Princess Di cross the road?
Momentum.
Q: Why did the baby cross the road?
A: It wasn't in its car seat.
My car fell in a ditch today. Didn't want any more cars falling, so I put a car-pet over it.