Restaurant jokes
Yo mama so stupid she thinks Taco Bell is a Mexican phone company.
What's the darkest point in the universe?
The inside of a KFC.
What did the customer say when Beef a Roo made him a bacon cheeseburger?
Thank a Roo.
Spell "Ihop," and then say, "'Ness, I ate your peanuts!"
Two Indians went to a fine restaurant. They ordered parathas with curry. HAHAHAHAHA
I asked a Japanese chef how to make a good bowl of ramen, he said "Let me show you."
Two sticks of butter walk into a butter bar. One says to the other, "Aren't you going to introduce me to your friends?" He replies, "Sure, dis my butter from another utter."
A young cowboy entered a seedy cafe in a small West Texas town.
He sat at the counter and spotted an elderly cowboy with his arms folded and his gaze fixed on a bowl of chili. After roughly 15 minutes of staring at it, the young cowboy boldly inquired, “If you’re not going to eat it, do you mind if I do?” Slowly turning his head toward the young wrangler, the older cowboy muttered, in his best cowboy voice, “Nah. Go ahead.”
The young cowboy eagerly reached over and slid the bowl over to his spot, spooning it in with glee. He was almost to the bottom when he noticed a rotten dead rat in the chili.
The sight was shocking, and he immediately upchucked the chili into the bowl. The old cowboy quietly said, “Yep, that’s as far as I got, too...”
You walk into a McDonald's and you ask for some extra mayo, and they put too much on there.
I say I didn't order a "McCumshot."
Did you hear about the new Chinese food?
It is called: “Wuhan Fried Bats”!
What's red, green, and slimy and slides down the chip shop window?
Abortion of chips.
What's gayer than a gangbang in a man sex ring?
Not slapping the ass at Hooters.
What do McDonalds and priests both do?
They both put their meat between 10-year-old buns.
Joe's pizzeria and abortion clinic.
Yesterday's loss is today's sauce.
What’s the difference between KFC and a woman on her period?
One’s finger-licking good and the other is just a fast food restaurant.
Did you hear about the new emo pizza? It cuts itself.
Person 1: "I love KFC."
Person 2: "Yeah, me too!"
Person 1: "How many have you gotten?"
Person 2: "How am I supposed to remember how many buckets of chicken I have ordered!?"
Person 1: "Chicken? What chicken? What do you think KFC stands for?"
Person 2: "Kentucky Fried Chicken?"
Person 1: "What? I thought it meant kidnapping foster children."
Person 2: "BLOODY WHATT??"
Do you like Wendy's? When deez nutz are in your mouth.
What do you call a stuck Panera Bread?
Panera Wedged.
I was drinking a martini when a waitress yelled, "Do you know CPR?"
I replied, "I know the entire alphabet!" We all laughed and laughed, well, except one person.