My wife and I were out to dinner and the waitress started flirting with me.
"She obviously has COVID," my wife said.
"Why?" I asked.
My wife replied with a sneer, "Because she has no taste!"
You're so fat that when you got to McDonald's, they had to call Wendy's for backup.
Have you heard of Wendy's?
Yea, Wendy's nuts in you mouth.
Chef: “How did you enjoy your steak, sir?”
Customer: “I asked for it medium rare, but it’s well done!”
Chef: “Why thank you.”
Customer: “You don’t understand, the steak is well done!”
Chef: “Of course it is, I made it.”
Me running from the table where the Emo table with a happy meal.
Credit to my boy tippecanoe3 for this joke.
What do you call it when Panera isn’t hungry?
Panera fed.
Credit to RogueRobot for this one:
What does Panera sleep in?
Panera bed.
What would you like as your last meal?
Fried chicken. Extra crispy.
Your hairline goes so far back that Crown Burger was Crown Sandwiches.
Friend A: Do you like Wendy's?
Friend B: Yes, why?
Friend A: Wen-dez nuts in your mouth!
Where do terrorists go for food? The Allah snack bar.
Wanted to go to the zoo, it was too packed, so I went to KFC instead. Their monkey enclosure is better anyway.
You know what's the difference between my basement and Chick-fil-A?
A lot of things.
Why did the rapper go to the seafood restaurant?
Because he heard they had PHAT BASS.
McDonald's worker be like, "Hello, would you like a Mc-Dick?" (You looked down) You: "Uhh, where's my dick?"
What do you call it when Panera Bread commits genocide?
Panera bloodshed.
Your mama is so nasty.
She showed up to Red Lobster with her own crabs.
Welcome to Antonio’s pizza and abortion, where yesterday’s loss is today’s sauce!
Where does a Muslim like to go and eat?
Allah's snackbar!
What does a woman and Kentucky Fried Chicken have in common?
By the time you're done with the breasts and the thighs, all you have left is the greasy box to put your bone in.
Where do you go to get the best fish?
A restaurant on the Titanic.
