Response jokes
When someone keeps talking while you are trying to focus on something, what is the rudest thing you can say to them?
SHUT UP!!!
I asked my class what comes before 47. Everyone said 46, except for the quiet kid who said, "AK."
A guy threatened to touch me yesterday...
I asked my North Korean friend, "what's it like to live in North Korea?" He responded, "can't complain."
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Europe.
Europe who?
No, I'm not.
Friend: Name one gay person off the top of your head.
Me: Me.
Yo mama so fat, every time she measures her carbon footprint the website breaks.
Doctor: What makes you feel depressed?
Me: I used to work at the World Trade Center, before the plane hit.
Doctor: A lot of people fell to pieces after that.
The man says, "Can you hump me?" So the other boy says, "Bro bro bro bro bro."
When people tell me to "go to hell," I tell them their address.
Mom, can I please go out and play?
... no answer.
My bully: Your face is ugly.
Me: Yeah well your mom is so fat she broke the stairway to heaven.
My bully: :(
If I called you gay, you would probably hit me with your purse.
Sister: Wanna know the difference between your singing and your flute playing?
Me: Sure... (Expecting a completely different response than what I get.)
Sister: Nvm, they have no difference.
Me: *Confused*
Sister: They're both horrible.
My brother called me short and ugly, so I called him an ambulance.
When someone says "Did I ask?" say "Then why did you respond?"
What are women allergic to and always try to dodge?
Accountability.
tbh, I was not even talking to you guys. I was talking to the funny jokes about Ariana, and people were saying she was adopted, so, tbh, fuck off!
Whoever says a joke "is not a joke" should go commit bye die.
What did the computer say when it was tired of the user?
Kiss my ASCII!