Reproduction jokes
What's the most embarrassing thing about locking your keys in the car outside a pregnancy care center?
Having to go inside and ask for a coat hanger.
Why do cannibals love sex? They can make their own food.
1+1=3, just add 9 months.
Q: What's the difference between a computer and an abortion clinic? A: Ctrl+Alt+Delete
What is an unborn baby's Olympic sport?
Dodge the coat hanger!
What is an unborn baby's Olympic sport?
Dodge the coat hanger.
I thought it would be fun to become a shooter. It became less fun when I realized that "shooting a woman up" also included a condom.
What do you call a too round egg?
A prEGGnant egg.
What song is sung when conceiving?
"Let's Get Physical, Physical!"
It used to be "My Body, My Choice" until Trump came to power. Now it's "Your Body, My Choice."
I don't like condoms, but I like gay pregnant X.
If her internal clock can tick, she can sit on my dick.
So you decide one day to ask your son if he wants to f**k, do you do it for 3 hours, then you realize how will I explain another pregnancy to my sterile husband?
When you pull out, but the baby's face turns blue.
Ah, son of a bitch, I got the truth stuck on my shoe?!?!
The truth: Breast feeding is like having long sex with your baby. God dammit, I hate the truth!
Guess what? If your mom ever wants to have sex with you, tell her to make another.
This is Riley abortion clinic. Yesterday's loss is today's sauce.
What does a cannibal call a pregnant woman?
A Kinder Joy.
Why do orphans enjoy orgasms?
Why did the sperm cross the road? To get to the vagina!