Reproduction jokes
Q: What's the difference between a computer and an abortion clinic? A: Ctrl+Alt+Delete
1+1=3, just add 9 months.
Q: How do you deliver an autistic baby?
A: A clothes hanger.
"Abortion jokes are like the babies; they never get old."
What does an abortion joke and a fetus have in common... The joke never gets old, and neither does the kid.
Why can't orphans have babies?
Because they have no one to call daddy.
So.. err actually, don’t worry. I was gonna make a joke about dead babies, but I had to abort.
Why do squirrels love dick?
Because it produces nut.
Jack and Jill went up the hill to do it in the water.
Jack slipped, and the condom ripped; now they have a daughter.
Girl: What is abortion?
Man: Ask your brother.
Girl: But I don't have a brother!
Man: Exactly!
Why are dogs born with balls?
They were having their stick moment when they got given birth, too.
What do orphans and sperm donor kids have in common? They don't have dads.
This is Riley abortion clinic. Yesterday's loss is today's sauce.
I'm not going bungee jumping. I was born by broken rubber, and that's not how I'm going out.
Sex is like math.
Subtract the clothes, add the bed, divide the legs, and pray to God there is no multiplying.
What's the difference between a pregnant one and a light bulb?
One you can unscrew.
How do you know if a black lady’s pregnant?
You put a banana up her vagina and see if any little monkeys come and get it.
Jack and Jill went up the hill to smoke some marijuana.
Jack got high, touched Jill's thigh, and said, "I know you wanna."
But silly Jill forgot her pill, and now they have a kid.
Why don’t babies pollinate flowers?
God chose Plan B.
Jack and Jill went up a hill to smoke some mairawanah.
Jack got high and grabbed her thigh and said, "I know you wanna," but dumb-ass Jill forgot her pills, and now they have 12 kids.