Relationship jokes
Boy: I'm dead.
Girl: Is that why you're so ugly?
Boy: No, I was just born this way.
Why can't an orphan have sex?
Because they can't scream "daddy!"
Why can't orphans be gay?
Because they can't call anyone their dad.
Blondes like their men how they like their rice: brown, 500 at a time, and all in her bowl.
Brings a whole new meaning to brotherly love.
So I was sitting at a bar, right? That fucking waitress came again, and guess what? She brought the wrong drinks again. So I send her away to get the correct drinks. And she came back again, with the wrong drinks!! Obviously, she was retarded. Anyways that's the story about how I met your mother.
I think I am a boomerang because I always come back to you.
You're adopted, do you want to know why? Because you're so ugly.
Are you a horse, because I want to ride you?
I love your mom and dad's joke! They made it together and called it your name.
If my son was a real man, I wouldn't have caught him fucking another man.
My friend Harry.
Got my girlfriend a "get better soon" card. She's not sick, I just think she can do better.
Why does my dad hate me? Really, please tell me, I'm tired of the constant abuse and pain.
Prince, I love you very much! Happy anniversary! Love you! ❤️❤️😘
A guy asks a girl to go to a dance. She agrees, and he decides to rent a suit. The rental has a long line, so he waits and waits, and finally he gets his suit.
He decides to buy flowers, so he goes to the flower shop. The flower shop has a long line, so he waits and waits, until he finally buys flowers.
He picks up the girl and they go to the dance. There is a long line into the dance, so they wait and wait.
Finally, they get into the dance, and the guy offers to get the girl a drink. She asks for punch, so he goes to the drink table, and there is no punch line.
I wasn't close to my father when he died. Which is lucky because he stepped on a landmine.
It's really funny, read through everything slowly.
Say "I'm a man" after everything I say.
I went to the bar. "I'm a man." You saw this woman. "I'm a man." You guys married. "I'm a man." You guys bought a house. "I'm a man." You guys went to bed. "I'm a man," you said. "I'm a man," she said. "I'm a man."
Why can’t orphans be gay?
Because they have no daddy to call.
Why does an orphan cry when we say "ur mom?"
Because they have no mom.