Relationship jokes
Orphan: I love abcdefu!
Caretaker: Why? You don't have anyone to flip off.
You're adopted, do you want to know why? Because you're so ugly.
My boyfriend dumped me. Guess who came back crawling for his zimmer frame?
I jump off a cliff and said I hate you, dumb blond, and eagle...Then I said to my wife, "We're done, Blondie," and said to my friend, "You're a dumbhead eagle!"
Bully: How’s your girlfriend?
Kid: I don’t have one. How are your parents?
Bully: *cries*
Kid: *Walks out of the orphanage*
What's the difference between a sex slave and a goat?
I don't have a sex slave in my basement...
My mom told me to recycle the trash. I guess I’m taking you for another bike ride!
"Go frick a cow!"
"I already fricked your mother."
What did the emo guy say to the emo girl?
"Like ur cute g."
Why do orphans like to have sex?
So they can finally have someone to call "daddy."
Kid on Xbox: I'm not a virgin. Ask your sister.
Bully on Xbox: I don't have a sister, dumbass.
Kid on Xbox: You will in 9 months.
She left, and now I support women's rights. I will kill her.
What makes Stephen Hawking and your dumped girlfriend similar?
They can't stand up for themselves.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Not your dad.
Why can't an orphan have sex?
They have no one to call "daddy."
What do you call 2 emos making out in a science classroom?
My Chemical Romance.
I tried to have phone sex once.
But the holes were too small.
Why can't orphans be gay? They don't know their daddy.
There was once a small earthquake, but when I got outside, I realized my brother was still stuck inside. When I told my mom, she just said, "It doesn't matter, you're my favorite anyway!"
My grandfather told me I'm too reliant on technology. I called him a hypocrite and unplugged his life support.