Relationship jokes
Gwen, let's chat at night for about 1 hour! I want to get to know each other better!
P.S., it's Jake.
What is the difference between a rock and my girlfriend?
One is rock hard, and the other is Dwayne Johnson.
More about Quinn: He loves Robin. He loves his tight ass. He licks up all his shit after Taco Bell.
What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife?
120 pounds.
What's the difference between you and a fridge? The fridge doesn't moan when I put my meat in.
Hey girl, are you a farmer? Because you sure know how to raise a cock.
"You're pretty, let me take you on a date!" Sike, I lied. You're ugly and fried. What you talking about?
OK, guys, quick update, what is going on with Freshfry, Drew, and Alya?
All they're doing is fighting, and I want to put an end to it. So Freshfry, Drew, and Alya all need to read this, OK. First, Freshfry, you should've just said OK the first thing he said, and Drew... really? You had to keep egging him on. I don't know about Alya, but it's like cats and dogs fighting. Just please stop fighting :(
There was once a small earthquake, but when I got outside, I realized my brother was still stuck inside. When I told my mom, she just said, "It doesn't matter, you're my favorite anyway!"
My sister is really disrespectful, and her famous words are, "You're not my parent!" The next time she says this, I'm going to respond back with, "You're right, because I would have worn a condom to protect from you being born unlike my dad did!"
Alright ALYA and drew ALYA's boyfriend!! Have a good fucking life, I hardly even think drew is real but uk whatever I've passed on but DREW if u fucking wanna beef, I'll fight u bro, ur prob a stick, I'm fucking doing push ups 4 times a week 100 each.
Mom!
"Knock, knock." "Who's there?" "Not your dad?"
Your dad.
drew here freshfry you are almost deadfry! I forgive you, just don't do it again. You know what I am talking about!
Quin loves Robin. All he says is "Robin." This isn't a joke; Quin's gay.
Today was the worst day ever. My ex got hit by a truck... On the plus side, my truck doesn't even have a dent.
Dark humor is like a dad - not everyone gets it.
While I was out shopping, I tripped in a store and a lady would not stop staring at me. For fun, I said, "Sorry! It's been a while since I've possessed a body." She looked horrified.
Dads are like boomerangs... I hope!
Son: Dad, why is my name Experience? Dad: Son, Experience is the name we give our mistakes.
You won't eat a human, so why eat meat? Bold of you to presume I won't eat a person.
Imagine when you are about to cry at the funeral, then your friend's phone rings.
Then he says, "I'll call you back, I'm still at the die."