Red jokes

Little Jimmy has 5 red apples. His dad's car will arrive in 20 minutes. Calculate the mass of the Sun.

Yo mama so fat, she the reason why Moses split the Red Sea.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Your wife needs Jon Grudon, too.

Roses are red, Violets are fine. Why is your life So much better than mine?

When I aim this trigger, it all goes red.

Do you have a bounty 'cause you got a "M" on your head?

What's red and got makeup all over?

A Bill Cosby victim.

What's young, red, and has hot PTSD?

Prince Andrew's victims.

White Russians, do you mean red, white, blue, and dead White Russians?

Guys, I'm back...

Here's my joke:

What is blue and red all over?

Blood in the water of a shark attack victim.

My friend looks more red than Mr. Krabs.

It’s weird, I could’ve sworn I saw the silhouette of a belt hurling towards him the other day.

Why is Mars red and not orange? Because it would be too bright.

Why are tomatoes red? Because they contain the carotenoid lycopene!

XD RawR woof woof bark bark UwU meowwwww ROFL LMAO LOLOLOOLOLOL KEKW KEKW PEPELASUGH

Roses are red, violets are violet. I mean, come on, it's literally in the name!

Teacher's pen is RED, our pen is BLUE, she is marking an EGG on my marksheet, left with questions and no CLUE.

What am I if my neck is covered in red bumps, my ears are the size of a giant corn cob, my skin is ruby red, my eyes are bloodshot, I have green skin, and fur growing all over my body? Horribly ugly.

Hi guys, I'm back! So I have a question for you. What is red and smells like blue paint? Type in comments what you came up with.

Red sky at night, shepherd's delight.

Blue sky at night, day.

Yo mama's cheeks are red, I don't know why.

The other day my girlfriend asked me to hand her the red lipstick, so I handed her the dog.

Roses are red, I like weed,

If you say yes then I'll do a "good deed."