Recreation jokes
Did you hear about the gay guy who got kicked off the golf course?
He was playing with too many strokes.
We went running on our camping trip. It was past tents.
A guy goes ice fishing for the very first time. All of a sudden, he hears a voice. “There are no fish under the ice!”
He ignores it and moves to another area, cuts a hole, and tosses his line in. Again, he hears the booming voice: “There are no fish under the ice!”
He nervously looks up and asks, “Lord? Is that you?”
“No, this is the rink manager!”
So I got my brother a jumping castle for his birthday. That bitch cried in his wheelchair.
Why couldn’t the kid play baseball? Because he couldn’t find home.
When you go to the community pool
What goes up and down and needs two people?
A seesaw.
Why did the rapper go to the beach?
To drop some QUICKSAND BARS.
Have you ever been to the ocean? Well, the smokers out there probably only seaweed!
What do you call a boomerang that won’t come back?
A stick.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because there would be no home base.
Why do fathers take an extra pair of socks when they go golfing?
In case they get a hole in one!
Last night I shared a bed with two of my friends because we were in a small hotel. We had strange dreams last night.
My friend on the left dreamed of getting a handjob.
So did my friend on the right.
I had a dream of skiing.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't hit a home run.
My wife saw me hit the best drive yesterday with my golf clubs.
I must have drove that chihuahua 300 yards.
Q: Why did the family want to move out while the neighbors were playing tennis?
A: Because they were a racquet!
Why did the golfer change his pants?
Because he got a hole in one!
Jack and Jill went up the hill to smoke some marijuana. Jack got high, grabbed her thigh, and said, "You know you wanna." Jill said yes and pulled up her dress, and then they had some fun, but silly Jill forgot her pill, and now they have a daughter.
Haha, I fucked you over!
Why did the little boy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms or legs.
What did the little boy get for Christmas? Cancer.
Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus.
Knock knock.....Who’s there... Not the little boy.
Why couldn't the surfer hang 10?
Because he forgot his feats!
"Look, Ma! I peed in the pool!"