Really Jokes

What kind of tea is really hard to swallow? Reality.

An orphan boy at my school did really bad in a test and started crying.

I said, “Don’t worry, your parents won’t say anything.”

Wife: “I want another baby.”

Husband: “That’s a relief, I also really don’t like this one!”

How much wood can a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? If you woodchuck on the world with that, you have a really deep in, and he says goodbye. When he says goodbye, you're like, "if you."

I don't really trust the press. Sometimes they wear badges that say "press," but if you press those badges, they just fall over, all surprised.

And there's the referee taking down Ronaldo's number.

Not really the time or the place, but it's good to see that we've kept homophobia out of football.

One day, I was walking down the street, and then I saw something really funny, and then I ran, and I saw a boomer, but I don't really know what I'm talking about, lol.

What's the difference between a pizza and a guy you really hate?

One won't scream when you remove their meat.

Pilot: So Kobe, it seems like you’re not going to make it to your destination in time, so I’m going to put it on autopilot so I can find a place to fill with gas.

Kobe: Take us to the side of that mountain at full speed. I don’t really want to go to the event anymore.

I saw two really tall guys. I walked up and said, "I didn't know we still have the Twin Towers!"

I like your cut, G.

*Slaps really hard*

BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-

What word starts with n and ends with r and you wouldn’t wanna call a Black person?

You really thought n****r, didn't you?

Marriage is really educational.

When I was single, I didn't even know there was a wrong way to put a fork in the dishwasher.

I don’t know why I go to the gym. Being healthy is dying as fast as possible, and I really want to speed that shit up.

I’m really good at algebra. I can replace your X without even asking Y.

What do alcoholics and gas prices have in common?

They both get really high.

A doctor walks into the room and tells his patient, "I have some bad news for you. You really have to stop masturbating."

The man looks aghast and says, "Oh my God, doc, why?!"

The doctor replies, "I'm trying to examine you."

I love sucking on food because if you really think about it, tits can be counted as food, so I could technically suck on a woman's tits.

Hey, you there, were you raised on a chicken farm? 'Cause you really know how to raise a cock!

For some reason, quarks sound really strange to me.