Really jokes

Q. What's red and pink and spins around really fast? A. A baby in a blender.

Did you hear about the guy who died by lethal injection and writhed on the stretcher for 20 minutes?

I guess it really IS all in the execution.

Cheer for fun on the telephone and singing, "We are family!" Even then, your dad, really, he's fat, just like your dad. And your mom's fat ass, b**** ass, looking like an Oompa Loompa self, looking like an ugly.

Hey, you there, were you raised on a chicken farm? 'Cause you really know how to raise a cock!

I love sucking on food because if you really think about it, tits can be counted as food, so I could technically suck on a woman's tits.

What’s something you can say at the funeral but also in bed?

"Damn, that's really stiff!"

I’m really good at algebra. I can replace your X without even asking Y.

Messi is really messy.

I don't think I could ever become a beggar. I really don't like change.

God: I feel like I'm forgetting something... oh no, Earth! *sees it on fire* Oh, it's fine.

People of Earth: *running and screaming*

Santen: *to God* Really?

Wife: “I want another baby.”

Husband: “That’s a relief, I also really don’t like this one!”

Me: *watching TV*

Mom: Omg, no way, your dad is coming!

Me: Really?

Mom: Obviously not, he never loved or wanted you.

How much wood can a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? If you woodchuck on the world with that, you have a really deep in, and he says goodbye. When he says goodbye, you're like, "if you."

What kind of tea is really hard to swallow? Reality.

An orphan boy at my school did really bad in a test and started crying.

I said, “Don’t worry, your parents won’t say anything.”

When a deaf person is on trial, is it really considered a hearing?

I don't really understand 9/11 jokes, but they eventually hit me like a plane.

Should cishet people REALLY be watching Ranboo?

My friend is upset with me because I sniffed his grandmother's nickers. Not sure if it was because she was still wearing them or if it was because the whole family was watching. Either way, the rest of her funeral was really awkward.

Is there a really annoying girl at your school and she's so fake? Well, say this:

Me: Hey, I have a nickname for you.

Her: Really? What?

Me: Sweet-in-low.

Her: Why?

Me: Because you're artificial.