Puns

What is the slipperiest county?

Greece!

Wanna see something dark?

Close your eyes.

Don't flirt when there is Life Alert!

Edna: Hey there big boy!

Big boy: You need to stop doing this.

Santa was in my social studies book. He was a redcoat.

What kind of bug lives in a graveyard?

A zom-BEE.

I submitted 10 puns to see if they'd make this list.

But no pun in ten did.

Yesterday I made food using oil--olive oil.

(I love oil!)

How do you knockout an unorthodox blue tooth?

You get a good connection.

I once had a patient who wanted to change his species.

I'll tell you, he was unBEARable.

A lumberjack goes to a person's house.

Then he realized the tree was too big and was stumped and had to leaf.

What’s the most artistic fruit?

Vincent mango.

What is Michael Jordan's favorite coffee place? Dunkin' Donuts.

Why did the toad cross the road?

To show his girlfriend he had guts.

A pun, a play on words, and a limerick walk into a bar.

No joke!

Thanks for explaining the word "many" to me.

It means a lot!

What do you call a tall, affluent person? A big success.

I told a seal a joke, it went like this: "Why did the kid cross the playground?" He said, "Why?" I said, "To get to the other slide." And then he said, "That's the sealiest thing I've ever heard!"

I went on a one in a lifetime vacation. Never again!

What side of the sidewalk do crazy people walk on? The psych-o-path.

What do you call a dinosaur that likes subtraction?

A galiminus.