Puns
Those were a-mug-zing jokes. They were Mugderful, and Mugjestic.
A woman has twins and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named "Ahmal." The other goes to a family in Spain; they name him "Juan." Years later, Juan sends a picture of himself to his birth mother. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wishes she also had a picture of Ahmal.
Her husband responds, "They're twins! If you've seen Juan, you've seen Ahmal."
I walked into a store, and I pointed a stick to the roof and said, "This is a stick up!"
There's at least 856 pages of these newest puns. I couldn't finish, because it took me an hour just to get that far. Just saying, that's a lot of jokes!
There was a guy how had a stroke, eh.
He's all right.
Me: (Tim) What's wrong?
Him: Wha...
Me: Are you inTIMidated?
What did the melon say to the avocado when he proposed?
Can't elope.
What did the human say to the fly when it was buzzing around the human's head?
"Would you stop bugging me!"
DON’T READ THIS IF YOU HAVE NOT PLAYED SETTLERS OF CATAN!
“Wheat is going on?” I asked my godmother. She replied “Godson, I really don’t know, but could you please get me some m-ore Shloer?”
“Ok, I’ll sheep if there’s any in the fridge!”
Hey Max, what's up? The sky.
I love escalator jokes. There's not too many steps.
What do Will from "Stranger Things" and the Fresh Prince of Bel-Air have in common? They're both named Will, and their lives both got flipped, turned upside down.
I was gonna tell you a pun about a bin but,
bin there, done that.
Why did the fly fly?
Because the spider spied her!
How does the sea say hello?
It WAVES you.
SEA what I did there?
I'm SHORE you saw it.
Don't be SALTY!
Why did the credit card go to jail?
'Cuz it was guilty as charged!
I always feel better when my doctor says something is normal for my age, but then think dying will also be normal for my age at some point.
My dignity to live.
Where do mathematicians go to die?
The symmetry.
What was a pedophile's hardest thing? Fitting in!