Politics jokes
Why is Bill the bad guy?
Monica wanted to suck dick.
How do you become with NATO? Promise no more world wars by secretly performing military practices behind their back.
The only reason communism started was because God looked at your face.
I can’t take credit for this joke; it’s not mine.
Remember that time Joe Biden fell off his bike? He said it’s not his fault. He blamed the tires for being too inflated.
How many Trump supporters does it take to fix a lightbulb?
None, Trump says it is all done and they cheer in the dark.
What is a government mandate?
When Obama and Biden go out to dinner together.
Manly men go to strip clubs. JD Vance goes to IKEA.
Difference between Texas and Flint, Michigan?
Nothing, no one cares how much lead is in those kids.
Hey JFK, what would you do if you were in a fight?
JFK: Well, I'd give them a piece of my mind.
"Yo mama's so fat that when she farts, Al Gore accuses her of global warming."
Fun fact: this category of jokes is the MOST hated one by feminists.
Unless you force them the point.
Random guy: Come on, Bin Laden, time is ticking. Get it, ticking. OK, I'll leave.
"Ukraine be like Escape to Witch Mountain!"
What do pretzels and a corrupt government have in common?
They are both twisted.
Yo mama so fat, Trump used her like a wall.
Why did the feminist get banned? For spreading conspiracy theories about the (non-existent) gender wage gap.
A Russian wife turned to her husband and asked...
"What's this special military operation our glorious leader keeps talking about?"
Her husband replied, "It's a proxy war between Russia and NATO."
"Oh, right. How's it going?"
"Well," he replied, "so far we've lost 200,000 soldiers, 4,000 tanks, 500 aircraft, numerous helicopters, loads of armoured vehicles and artillery pieces along with our 'flag ship'."
"Wow! What about NATO?"
"They haven't turned up yet."
A dead Russian is Trump's accountant.
What do you call a Fuhrer who's also a fitness coach?
Adolf Fit-ler.
A kid asks Trump:
Kid: "Where are the confidential files?"
Trump: "There they are, bud!"