Play jokes

What do you call a man who plays Fortnite 24/7?

A: A virgin.

A couple of cows were smoking a joint and playing cards...

The steaks were pretty high.

Father: I’m taking your toys to the orphanage.

Child: But why?

Father: So you won’t be bored. You’re going to need them there.

Why did Hitler stop playing Golf?

He kept getting stuck in the Bunker.

What's the a simulation between a penis and a Rubik's cube?

The more you play with it, the harder it gets.

Parents: "OH! Honey, we were just wrestling!"

Little Johnny: "OK! I'll join you!"

People in plays say that everyone's life is a drama, but mine's a tragedy.

Wanna play shark attack? I eat, you scream!

Communists don't play Minecraft.

They play Ourcraft.

What game do zombies like to play?

Corpse and Robbers.

Let's play carpenter. First, we'll get hammered, then I'll nail you.

What did the orphan say to the other? "Quickly Robin, to the Batmobile!"

I told the emo girl to stop playing fruit ninja on her wrists.

I was playing football with my friends, and I got tackled and got a penalty. Suddenly, the ground started shaking, and Penaldo emerged from the mud. He took the penalty, but since it wasn't Andorra, he missed. Shame on you, Penaldo!

You know why emos get excited playing Minecraft? They see a creeper.

What's an African's favorite sport to play, but they can't? Water polo.

Two boys came home for dinner late, and their mother asked, "Where have you boys been?" One of them replied with, "We were all over the neighborhood, we're mailmen now." Their snobby teen sister said, "Well, you're not real mailmen, real mailmen use real letters." Then one of the boys said, "Actually, we used real letters, we found a whole box of them under your bed."

I am a registered sex offender. I'm just playing, I'm not registered yet.

Why does Michael Jackson have such a hard time playing chess?

He can't choose between black or white.

What's in common with Michael Jackson and a phone?

Kids play with both of them.