"Jack Sparrow."
"Captain, Captain Jack Sparrow!"
Pirate Jokes
Why is the rum gone?
"The problem is not the problem. The problem is your attitude about the problem." - Jack Sparrow
I've got a jar of dirt! I've got a jar of dirt, and guess what's inside it!
What does a pirate say to the president?? Spread your legs so I can get my treasure back.
Two pirates, Morty and Sol, meet in a bar. Sol has a patch over one eye, a hook for a hand, and a wooden peg leg. “Ye gads, matey,” says Morty. “What happened to ya?” Sol says, “Me pirate ship was attacked, and a lucky shot lopped off me leg. So now I got me a wooden peg.”
“And yer hand?” asks Marty.
“When me ship sank, a shark bit me hand off. So now I got me a hook.”
“OK, but what’s with the eye patch?”
“I was standin’ on a dock, and the biggest seagull I ever saw poops right in me eye.”
“But ya don’t go blind from no seagull poop.”
“True,” says Sol. “But it was me first day with the hook.”
Do you play Sea of Thieves? See if these balls fit in your mouth, gotteeeem!
Why could not the 11 year old watch the pirate movie?
because it was rated RRRRGGGG.
I am guessing you don't understand :(
Why don't pirates take a bath before walking the plank?
'Cause they just wash up onshore.
Why do pirates say, "Argh my Hardees?"
Because that's how you tell when they have the hards.
What makes piracy and anti-piracy so unique?
One isn't that of a thief, while the other is as serious as fuck.
How much do pirate earrings cost? 🤔
Answer: A buck an ear. 🤣
Why are pirates pirates?
Because they're Arrrrrrrggghhh!!!
What do you call a Pirate Pokemon?
Arrrrrr-ceus!
Why can't pirates play cards in the jungle?
Too many cheetahs.
Why do pirates pirate? Because they "Arrrrrrrrrgggghhh!" Hahahahahahahahaha!
How do pirates like their movies?
You already know the answer, don't you?
Well...
ARRR rated! Huh huh huh...
What's a pirate's favorite letter?
(People will then say "r")
Arrr, you think it be "r" but really it's the "C" that they love.
What's a pirate's least favorite letter?
Dear sir,
You are being investigated for downloading illegal copyrighted material, and your internet will be cut off.
The pirate looked down the toilet, and what did he see?
The captain's log.
Why doesn't the pirate go to the strip club?
Because he has ALL of the booty!
