Nautical jokes
Well, we started off by ripping up ALL of the decking.
Abandon ship!
Three copycats on a boat, one jumps off. How many are left? Zero, because they're copycats!
In 1492 Christopher Columbus sailed the ocean blue.
He sat on a rock, tickled his cock, until it turned red, white, and blue!
What do you call a lesbian pirate?
Red Beard.
A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel on his pants, a peg leg, and a parrot on his shoulder. The bartender says, "Hey, you’ve got a steering wheel on your pants."
The pirate says, "Arrrr, I know. It’s driving me nuts."
des get back on DND beyond
Why are pirates pirates?
Because they're Arrrrrrrggghhh!!!
What is a pirate's favorite letter? You might think it’s the "R," but it’s actually the "C".
Once there was a boat. Its friends said,
"It's time to come back." And the boat said,
"No way. I don't give into pier pressure."
It's tricky when you're both a moth and a sea captain in charge of a ship, but up ahead, you see a lighthouse.
Why don't pirates take a bath before walking the plank?
'Cause they just wash up onshore.
3.14% of sailors are pirates.
A boat carrying red paint and a boat carrying blue paint crashed into each other. The crews were marooned.
Why can't pirates play cards? Because they're standing on the deck.
When do you know you are getting a good deal on a boat? -- When there's a sail on it.
Why don’t pirates take a shower before they walk the plank?
They just wash up on shore.
What did the pirate say on his 80th birthday?
Aye, matey!
A pirate walks into a bar and has a ship's wheel in his pants.
The bartender asks, "What's with the wheel in your pants?"
The pirate replies, "Yarrr! It's drivin' me nuts!"
What did the pirate say when he turned 80?
"Aye, matey."
What do you call a man with no arms or legs being pulled by a boat?
Skip.
Why does it take so long for the pirates to learn the alphabet?
Because they spend years on C! Pirate: A, B, sea?