Pirate

Pirate jokes

Letter

  • What's a pirate's favorite letter?

    (People will then say "r")

    Arrr, you think it be "r" but really it's the "C" that they love.

    What's a pirate's least favorite letter?

    Dear sir,

    You are being investigated for downloading illegal copyrighted material, and your internet will be cut off.

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  • Card

  • Why didn't the pirate want to play cards?

    Because he was standing on the deck!

    Tavern

  • A pirate walks into a tavern with a pirate ship attached to his nutty wuttys. It's driving me nuts!

    A troll proceeds to pull out a desert eagle and shoot the pirate in the face. He makes a poggers face and says, "Problem??"

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  • Year

  • Why does it take so long for the pirates to learn the alphabet?

    Because they spend years on C! Pirate: A, B, sea?

    Theater

  • Q: What does Abraham Lincoln have in common with a poor quality pirated movie?

    A: They were both shot in a theater.

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  • Key

  • What's a pirate's favorite key on the keyboard?

    Others: R.

    Rrrr, you would think so, but it be the C.

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  • Bar

  • A pirate walks into a bar and has a ship's wheel in his pants.

    The bartender asks, "What's with the wheel in your pants?"

    The pirate replies, "Yarrr! It's drivin' me nuts!"

    Bar

  • A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel on his pants, a peg leg, and a parrot on his shoulder. The bartender says, "Hey, you’ve got a steering wheel on your pants."

    The pirate says, "Arrrr, I know. It’s driving me nuts."

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