Picture jokes

What's the difference between Jesus and a picture of Jesus?

It only takes one nail to hang up the picture.

Where does Spider-Man keep his pictures?

On a website.

The other day I went to a museum. My friend and I went to the Holocaust section, and he got choked up when he saw the Anne Frank picture. I asked him, "Why are you sad? It's just an ashtray."

My boy, I think it is about time that I leave this world. Now draw your weapon and kill me now!

*draws a picture of his "epic" sword*

"What... WHAT... WTH ARE YOU DOING SIMPLETON? I DIDN'T MEAN THAT KIND OF DRAW!"

Your mom is so fat when you printed the picture, it would not stop printing! 😂🤣

What is the difference between Jesus and a painting of Jesus?

You’ll only need a single nail to hang the picture frame up.

Your mama is so fat that she took a picture at Christmas, and it's still downloading.

Yo mama so fat, I took a picture of her and she was on both sides of it.

A woman has twins and gives them up for adoption. One goes to a family in Egypt and is named "Amal." The other goes to a family in Spain, who name him "Juan." Years later, Juan sends a picture of himself to his mother.

Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal. Her husband responds: "They're twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

You're so cool that celebrities take pictures of you.

Me to bully: You are so fat that when the satellite took the picture, you were considered as an island.

Bully: (Speechless)

The first ever picture of a black hole got released. It sucks.

If emo grass cuts itself for you, then what do transgender picture frames do?

I swear I always finish on page 3 when I'm looking at family pictures.

Do you know why Jesus is so popular with the ladies??

Haven't you ever seen pictures of the guy? He was hung like this... 🤚--------🤪----------✋

What do you call an orphan taking a family photo?

A selfie.

What’s the difference between the real Jesus and a picture of him?

It only takes one nail to hang up the picture.

Yo mama is so ugly that when Santa came to the house and saw a picture of her, he died.

Yo mama so fat her yearbook picture was a double-page spread.

I told the ugly friend in my friend group that when they daydream, they shouldn't picture themselves because it will just ruin it.