Physics jokes
Why didn't Stephen Hawking cross the road?
Because he rolled over to the other side!
Why was Stephen Hawking so good at FIFA? He had 99 dribble.
Stephen Hawking died.
Why can't Stephen Hawking go to heaven?
'Cause he'd walk up the stairs!
I like balls.
Memes
Why couldn't Stephen Hawking go to Heaven?
Because there were stairs.
Do atoms eat booty? No, because they are too cool. ;)
Why can’t Stephen Hawking go to heaven?
Because it’s a stairway to heaven, not a ramp.
How did Stephen Hawking die?
He had a computer virus!
Can a kangaroo jump higher than a house?
Of course it can, a house can't jump.
Stephen Hawking went on a date last night.
She left after 15 minutes, complaining she didn't like his tone.
What do you call a physically disabled man who is sitting on the toilet inside the handicapped stall inside the men's restroom?
Sex worker.
Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a bucket of water.
WHERE DO THEY REALLY GO BECAUSE WATER CAN NOT BE AT THE TOP OF A HILL!?. I honestly think that only people with a physics degree can make nursery rhythms.
When someone throws something at your forehead, it stops moving and goes into orbit around your forehead.
Dads are like boomerangs, I hope.
What hit the ground first, a feather or the emo kid?
The feather, because the emo kid was left hanging.
Steven Hawking walks into a bar... Yeah.
(Not Original Joke)
What falls but never gets hurt? Snow.
What was Stephen Hawking's favorite toy as a child?
Hot Wheels.
Dad: Why did Jimmy fall off his bicycle?
Son: Why?
Dad: Because somebody threw a washing machine at him.