Physics jokes
Why was Stephen Hawking so good at FIFA? He had 99 dribble.
I like balls.
Why couldn't Stephen Hawking go to Heaven?
Because there were stairs.
Why can’t Stephen Hawking go to heaven?
Because it’s a stairway to heaven, not a ramp.
Why can't Stephen Hawking go to heaven?
'Cause he'd walk up the stairs!
Memes
Do atoms eat booty? No, because they are too cool. ;)
How did Stephen Hawking die?
He had a computer virus!
You're so skinny, when you did your first jump on a pogo stick you would never come back.
When someone throws something at your forehead, it stops moving and goes into orbit around your forehead.
Dads are like boomerangs, I hope.
Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a bucket of water.
WHERE DO THEY REALLY GO BECAUSE WATER CAN NOT BE AT THE TOP OF A HILL!?. I honestly think that only people with a physics degree can make nursery rhythms.
What falls but never gets hurt? Snow.
Dad: Why did Jimmy fall off his bicycle?
Son: Why?
Dad: Because somebody threw a washing machine at him.
Think like a proton--stay positive!
What was Stephen Hawking's favorite toy as a child?
Hot Wheels.
Stephen Hawking went on a date last night.
She left after 15 minutes, complaining she didn't like his tone.
Can a kangaroo jump higher than a house?
Of course it can, a house can't jump.
Steven Hawking walks into a bar... Yeah.
(Not Original Joke)
Do you know why an atom is positive? He kept his electrons.
What hit the ground first, a feather or the emo kid?
The feather, because the emo kid was left hanging.