Personal jokes
A man who desperately wanted to be good after serving time in prison was visited by an Angel. "You want to change? You can still enter heaven on two conditions. You must bet on the horses with any money you have and pass your winnings to someone less fortunate, and you must never hold on to any beef." The Angel then disappeared.
The man did as was told and became generous and kind. As he emerged from the betting office with all his money, he would pass every penny of it all to a deserving person each and every time.
He, however, couldn't seem to avoid meat and would still eat it no matter what.
When he died, the Angel came back for him.
"But I'm undeserving; I can't come with you," he said.
"Yes, you can," replied the Angel, "you gave all your stake (steak) away."
The teacher says to do your homework. I do. My friends do. One person never does any of his homework.
Eventually, we had to have fun. He said he didn't do it. WOW what did he do? I like to think he got smacked and nearly committed suicide.
1st Person: Do you want to know something funny?
2nd Person: Yeah, sure!
1st Person: I don’t know, I’m German!
What do you call an Indian person who is not starving? Dead.
Why should you put an autistic person in a refrigerator?
Because otherwise you’ll get a rotten vegetable.
(Not meant to be triggering).
i would try so hard not to laugh if that person was next to me
I told my fam a joke.
They all looked at me weird and one person even said, "I’m sorry!"
I’m light as a feather, yet the strongest person can’t hold me for five minutes. What am I?
It's not a hate crime if you don't hate the person.
The last words from a depressive person are: "I finally see a train!"
What is the difference between an orphan and a homeless person? Nothing, haha.
If an old person tells you what to do just say, "At least my parents are alive!"
Orphan: Have you seen my mommy?
Person: Are you an orphan?
Orphan: Yes?
Person: SON SON??? IS THAT YOU MY LOVE?
Orphan: MOTHER!
Person: Let's go home!
Orphan: Uhhhh
*She was never to be seen again*
A handicapped person and an orphan get into a fight. The orphan says, "At least I have two functional legs." The handicapped person says, "At least I have two functional parents."
I went to a depressed person and said, "Do you wanna hang with me?"
An LDS preacher knocks on the door with a chalice of wine offering to do the sacrament.
The person living there points and says, "Begone, foul blood-drinker!"
And promptly the preacher bursts into flames, leaving nothing but ash.
They call me Juan, they call me Jose, but I'm Juan person.
Person 1: Hey, did you hear about the circus fire?
Person 2: No.
Person 1: It was in-tents.
What's the quickest way to get to the hospital? Just stand in the middle of a busy road.
What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.
What do my dad and Nemo have in common? They both can't be found.
What do you do after raping a deaf person? Cut their fingers off so they don't tell anyone.
MORE JOKES COMING SOON LMAO ;]
Comments of Gwen in her bra!
Jordan Jadoke: Wow such a good looking kid!
Heo: Dude stop! Who the hell got this!
prince/mr tallie: Hey stop!
YOU: Sexy sexy sexxy! How much does she cost!
Kenya Bailey: NOTHING SHE IS NOT A SEX SLAVE SHE IS PERSON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Fuck u Kenya: SHUT UP!
Big Ideas: Do u think I hav a chance with her? Cause if then SWEET!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Kariah: STOP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Mariah: U GUYS EXPECT PRINCE, HEO, AND KENYA ARE GOOD PEOPLE THAT ARE NOT CHILD MOLESTERS!!!!!!!!!!
Hot: 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
Fring: I want to take u home all to my self!
If you're a cat person, never let hungry Chinese into your house. They might just have a snack.